To communicate with tact and diplomacy, you need to be sensitive and respectful. However, this can be more challenging than it first seems. People are sensitive to different things. And what one person sees as a lack of respect may not be an issue for another. For example, some people think it's respectful to make eye contact, while others do not.
It's important to take into account the communication styles of others. These communication styles are based upon their preferred behaviors. There are a range of behaviors that fall within a people's communication styles. This includes not only what they say, but also what they do.
Situational factors also affect communication styles. Someone who's excited will act differently than someone who's angry. And a person might be more serious when speaking to a manager than when talking to a coworker. It's all relative.
You can deduce people's communication style preferences by their verbal and nonverbal behaviors. Communication styles tend to be open or closed and direct or indirect.
People who are open tend to be extroverts – that is, they're willing to share their emotions and interact more readily with others. They're energized by this kind of communication.
People who are closed tend to be introverts. They prefer to keep their emotions to themselves. They also tend to interact less with others than extroverts.
People who are direct tend to get right to the point. They're usually assertive. They often make decisions and handle confrontation quickly and decisively.
People who are indirect tend to be less forward than those who are direct. They weigh all options before making decisions. They're also not entirely comfortable with confrontation and may shy away from it.
The benefit of identifying preferred communication styles is having more tactful and diplomatic interactions. You'll get a general idea of how people prefer to give and receive information. From there, you can respond to their communication styles.
Responding to communication styles
Say you're someone who loves to discuss details. It could be appropriate to have an in-depth conversation with a coworker who feels the same way. But it may not be tactful and diplomatic to do so with a manager who's more direct.
Tactful and diplomatic communication requires you to draw on qualities from different communication styles. When speaking to someone, consider that person's communication style preferences. After you have an idea, tailor your message. Such an approach is sensitive and respectful to the person's preferences. It can also help you say the best thing, and build better relationships.
When adjusting your communication style, you may have to adjust the levels of certain qualities:
- dominance – Dominance refers to the amount of control within a conversation or relationship. People with higher levels of dominance want to be in control. People with lower levels of dominance are more passive and tend to avoid confrontation.
- sociability – Sociability has to do with people skills. Those who enjoy interacting openly and often with others have higher levels of sociability. Those who are more reserved and introverted have lower levels of sociability.
- compliance – Compliance deals with the ability to follow rules. People who follow rules to the letter have higher levels of compliance than those who don't necessarily do what they're told.
- patience – Patience is the ability to endure difficult circumstances. People with higher levels of patience can persist in difficult situations without irritation. People with lower levels of patience don't have as much tolerance.